Our next leg, an overnighter in the resort town of Hakone, was the one that worried me most. Our first step was to take the subway to Odawara Station on the southwestern outskirts of Tokyo. From there it’s a 38-minute bus ride up a narrow, switchback road to the bus stop corresponding to the hotel or ryokan you’ve reserved for the night. If you’re subject to motion sickness, pack your Dramamine. If you’re squeamish about getting naked in front of total strangers, the Hakone ryokan experience may not be for you.
A ryokan is a traditional Japanese inn, usually with communal baths separated by gender, rooms that feature futon mattresses and tatami mats rather than Western-style carpets and beds respectively, and delicious meals prepared and served on-site. Hakone is a geothermally active region, so most ryokan there offer spa baths with naturally hot mineral water that’s believed to be good for body and soul. I figured we could use a good ryokan after the physical demands of a full day of travel, four days in the Tokyo Disney resort and two in Tokyo proper. After hours of research, I chose a ryokan called Madoka No Mori, an expensive sojourn to be sure but one with a number of desirable amenities.
Amanda has a tattoo on her left leg. In recent decades, tattoos have been associated in Japan with the yakuza, aka Japanese mobsters, so they’re banned in most public onsen (the Japanese word for natural hot spring baths). Madoka No Mori offers private, in-room onsen plus communal onsen divided by gender. I wasn’t sure how excited Amanda might be about doffing her togs around other women, so this solved both problems. Madoka No Mori also offers a kaiseki dinner — more about that in a moment — and filling breakfast, so it’s basically a B and D and B. As most Hakone ryokan do, it boasts amazing views of the surrounding mountains and woodlands, which were (because I planned it this way) changing colors gloriously for autumn. This ryokan was a get, as ryokan have few rooms and tend to sell out the day those rooms are offered. Remember those millions of people who live all over Tokyo? Well, Hakone is beautiful and close enough to draw them in droves, even on a Monday and Tuesday. Hakone is also popular in the spring, when the sakura (cherry trees) bloom into pink and white majesty, so remember to book early if you’re planning to arrive during either shoulder season.
Upon arriving at the inn, we were asked to remove our shoes. During our stay we would wear either slippers or, any time we were standing on tatami, split-toed socks. We were offered and invited to wear pajamas with a lightweight yukata robe over them, which I found both flattering and comfortable.
After a light refreshment of tea and sweets while the staff completed our check-in, we were shown to our room. Imagine a cube with blank walls and a soft, green, woven mat on the floor, and you basically have the idea. There was almost no furniture; the staff would roll out and dress our futons while we ate dinner. In the meantime we availed ourselves of a dip in the in-room onsen. Before you get in, you should shower thoroughly to avoid soiling the bathwater. Do not wear a swimsuit. Do not, in fact, wear anything other than possibly a cold hand towel on your head to reduce overheating. Acclimate yourself to the water temperature by first getting in up to your waist. Then, lower yourself to the neck, take a few deep breaths, close your eyes and let the Japanese analogue of Calgon take you away.
In case you’re wondering, we did work up the courage to bathe with others that night and the next morning. Honestly, it was no big deal. Think of it like taking a shower at the gym. And there are advantages to using the communal bath even if your room has private onsen: At Madoka No Mori, the communal dressing rooms offer warm tea and those top-dollar, Japanese massage chairs I’ve drooled over in Sharper Image catalogs. Do, however, wear ryokan PJs while sitting in those.
To call the staff of Madoka No Mori welcoming and deferential would be to undersell it, even by Japanese standards. We were treated like daimyos (Japanese feudal lords). It was almost too much. They bowed and scraped to us so often I felt the need to ask whether it’s proper etiquette to bow back. (It isn’t. In preschool English, our kimono-clad dinner server laughed awkwardly before replying, “I work here. You no work.”) A short while after our initial dip in the in-room onsen, we were ushered to a table in a private dining room, where, over the course of the next two hours, we were served a nine-course kaiseki meal fit for the shogun. Kaiseki is the Japanese equivalent of haute cuisine. It emphasizes local ingredients, ancient cooking techniques, variety, seasonality and visual aesthetics, delivering completely on all fronts. Interestingly, the word kaiseki derives from a phrase that means “breast-pocket stone,” a reference to a habit among Zen monks of putting warm stones in their pockets to ward off hunger pangs. Don’t worry, hunger will be the least of your problems after a modern kaiseki feast.
You might, however, be thrown by some of the ingredients. Not the A1 wagyu beef tenderloin, mind you, grilled over an eco-friendly hydrogen flame — That was impeccable. I mean: Wow. That cow was living its best life. No, I was thinking of several vegetable and seafood ingredients including cod milt, which, if that’s something you’ve never encountered before, you should probably not Google at any time before or during your stay. It was good, though. I liked it, not enough to order it again but … enough. Other dishes, especially the soup, were so fantastic they all but brought tears to our eyes, so it really did feel like we were Japanese royalty for a night. Sugoi! (Cool!)
After breakfast the next morning, we were rested and ready to see the local sights, which included a ride up the Hakone Ropeway. That’s a gondola lift system that carries travelers up a mountain past fuming, sulfurous volcanic vents. On the other side you’ll find Lake Ashi, which you can cruise aboard one of two decked-out “pirate” ships — so we did. On clearer days than we experienced, you might have a great view of Fuji. We did not. We did, however, see the lakeside torii gate of the famously lovely local shrine.
I’m told the Hakone Open-Air Museum is an outdoor art collection worth visiting, but we elected to retrieve our bags from storage at Odawara Station and continue our journey south. Enough kaiseki cod milt and self-conscious naked time for us — We were amped to visit historic Kyoto!
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